It's cliché. And I just experienced the heart-pounding agitation of it.
It was my vulnerability at its finest. Whoa! It was like debating whether to lay everything down or not, or even just half of it. Or to say it indirectly and just let the person find out what you mean, or do the reverse psychology, hoping they will get what you mean. I don't think the latter part really explains it, but whatever. Personally, I do that sometimes. haha :) But it's kind of a defense, you know. It's a technique when you're not so sure, or when you are not ready. It is to save yourself from bigger disappointments.
So back to the "putting my heart on my sleeve" moment. We talked again, like always. And yes, I was being a marshmallow. I don't think it was bad at all. It was just a bit risky -- risky in a way that I am not really sure what would his response be and where would the conversation go, though we both have an idea about each other. Still, I came to a point of fast heartbeats and very active brain cells. haha :P I didn't really lay everything down. I didn't really say the exact words that were on my mind, but it was sort of close, I'd say. I think I was quite in the safe zone. Again, not bad. Not bad at all.
And I quote him, "kung di man ikaw, ikaw parin."
It was my vulnerability at its finest. Whoa! It was like debating whether to lay everything down or not, or even just half of it. Or to say it indirectly and just let the person find out what you mean, or do the reverse psychology, hoping they will get what you mean. I don't think the latter part really explains it, but whatever. Personally, I do that sometimes. haha :) But it's kind of a defense, you know. It's a technique when you're not so sure, or when you are not ready. It is to save yourself from bigger disappointments.
So back to the "putting my heart on my sleeve" moment. We talked again, like always. And yes, I was being a marshmallow. I don't think it was bad at all. It was just a bit risky -- risky in a way that I am not really sure what would his response be and where would the conversation go, though we both have an idea about each other. Still, I came to a point of fast heartbeats and very active brain cells. haha :P I didn't really lay everything down. I didn't really say the exact words that were on my mind, but it was sort of close, I'd say. I think I was quite in the safe zone. Again, not bad. Not bad at all.
And I quote him, "kung di man ikaw, ikaw parin."
And I hope, always. *fingers crossed*
No comments:
Post a Comment